Make a List

     Today I want to talk to you about developing lists. And no I don’t mean a shopping list. These lists are designed for you to look at what you want in the forms of a partner, friends, relationships, and even yourself. It is writing down what you see, want and expect to find in another person and ultimately yourself. 

     So here we go. 

     Make a T on the page. Write down a name of a person that you want to explore. In the T on one side write likes and the other side dislikes. Then write on a separate page the reasons for your thoughts. What is it about the person and why do you like/dislike that attribute in them. 

     Now that you have your lists, really look at them and ask yourself do you see yourself in any of these behaviors that you like or dislike. If they are dislikes in yourself make that list because that is the list you are going to use to make changes in yourself. 

     For instance if you say that Sally makes condescending comments, look at the comments, what do they revolve around and what is it that you are doing for her to talk this way. It is said that what happens in our lives Is because that is what we are attracting. An old adage is “birds of a feather flock together.” This is so serious because if we want to make a difference we have to know what it is that we need to change inside of ourselves. 

     I current have a friendship that I am looking at and wondering what it is that makes her say the things she does to me. I kind of feel like she is my mother hen, so I have to ask myself why; I know that I have been through many things in the past two years but I am not that inept, at least I sure hope not. Then again, I also need to look at where she has been and is currently. Sometimes we speak words that “we” need to hear. We just need to shut up and listen. 

     So let me know how you are doing and what your thoughts are. It is such a huge important process and yes it does take a lot of dedication and work. But to become more you have to do the work. Of course you do have an option. You can just be what you are today, continue to live your life as it is and be O.K. with it. But for me I am 60 and I am not O.K. with what is or has been. 

Wishing you love, peace and joy.

Carol 

Becoming a butterfly